Differences Between Men and Women

This past week in class we have talked about the many differences between men and women. In, general, females are able to observe emotions better than males. They are also like to empathize with people and are better at listening and responding to situations. Males for the most part communicate non-verbally. They are more action focused and tend to be more protective and aggressive. Talking about the many differences between men and women, it was interesting to see how well those differences complement each other. Children should be able to be raised in an environment with both a mother and a father because they each have individual traits to offer that the other parent cannot.

Family Systems

This week in class we learned to look at our own families and figure out how it works. We were asked to compare our family to some sort of model and the model I decided to compare my family to is chocolate chip cookies. It was a cool experience take a step back and see what each member of my family contributes to make us a whole. I encourage everyone to think about what each individual of their family does to make their family work. It made me a lot more aware of everything my family does and it made me appreciate each member more. I also realized things that I could be working on to improve relationships with my sisters and parents.  After realizing these things, I decided to set myself goals to better the relationships with my family members.

Family Boundaries

This week in class we learned about all the different types of boundaries there can be within a family unit. There are three types. There is the rigid boundary, where its pretty much like a wall between two people. There is little known about each other's life and they don't really communicate with each other. Then there is the permeable or clear boundaries. That means there is an equal amount of exchange and they have a healthy relationship. Then there is the poor or diffuse boundary, where two people are either very open or overly open with each other.

After learning about these boundaries, I made connections with the relationships in my family. Something I have always noticed is the great relationship my parents have with each other. They definitely have a clear boundary. Whenever they are in an argument, they don't ignore each other, or yell at each other. They have clear communication and work out what they need to and move on. They don't shut each other out. They are truly each other's best friends. The relationship my parents have has been an example to me and that is something I strive to have with my future husband.

Changes in the Family

This week in class, we discussed how the family unite has changes so much over the years. There are so many family trends that have increased more and more.
 Some of those trends are:

• More people are living alone. This trend has increased dramatically over the years. According to our text book, Marriage & Family: The Quest for Intimacy by Lauer and Lauer, The number of people living alone in the US in 1970 was about 11 million. In 2009, the number of people living alone was about 32 million. The numbers almost tripled. This is important because more and more people are choosing not to get married or have families. They would rather live on their own and do their own thing.
• More people are delaying marriage and children. In class it was brought up how the average ages to get married now are 26 for woman and 28 for men. I think part of this reason could be that people want to experience being on their own and enjoy being single before they have to be tied down to a spouse and a family. It has also been noticed that people are delaying having children, some women well into their 30's. I think the reason for this is because people want to be financially ready and so they put it off until they think they could afford having children. The problem with this is that when women start having children in their mid 30's, they won't be able to have as many children as they could have had, because they started so late. President Spencer W. Kimball once said, "Have your family as the Lord intended. Of course it is expensive, but you will find a way, and besides, it is often those children who grow up with responsibility and hardships who carry on the world’s work." I like this quote because it really if we wait for the perfect time to have children, we might be waiting all of our lives. Families will be blessed.
• Another trend that has increased over the years is cohabitation. Couples are choosing to live together before marriage to either, test it out, or because they don't want to make the commitment of marriage, but they want to be together. Studies have shown that couples who live together before marriage have a higher chance of divorce than those who don't. Which leads me to my last point.
• Over the years, divorce has begun to be more common. In the 70's a law was passed that people no longer had to have the reason of abuse, infidelity or neglect to divorce their spouse. People could now divorce if they wanted to for no reason. This raised the divorce rate dramatically. 

I haven't seen any of these trends in my family. My family is pretty traditional in the way that my parents were married in their early 20's and began to have children about a year after. I come from a family of four girls, me being the second oldest. This week's lesson has made me more thankful for the traditional family that I have. I'm glad I had the opportunity to grow up with a loving father and mother in the same home and have my three sisters to grow up with.